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Writer's pictureDebbie Vallejo

The God-Given Beauty of Friendship




Friendship is one of life’s most precious gifts. I spent this past weekend with wonderful friends. We’ve been through a lot together, and I’m reminded how much I appreciate them and am thankful God put them in my life when we attended Texas A&M together over thirty years ago.


College friendships are unique. They form during a time of life when we are figuring out who we are and what we believe. I remember lots of late-night conversations, church retreats, Bible studies, dancing at the Hall of Fame, game nights, lunches, and on and on. We were roommates and good friends – we were together A LOT.  

 

Staying connected after college can be difficult. Jobs, marriage, kids, just general life stuff, can pull us in different directions. But it seems no matter how much time goes by; we reconnect in the foundations built all those years ago.

 

The Bible speaks powerfully about the value of having friends. It highlights not only the beauty of companionship but also the way friends sharpen and refine us. John 15:13 says, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” Jesus modeled the ultimate form of friendship, one rooted in sacrifice and selflessness. His love is the standard for how we are called to love our friends. That is an incredibly high bar and can be intimidating if we forget the gift of Jesus example and the Holy Spirt living in us.

 

True friendship is also demonstrated in times of adversity. When life throws its hardest punches, the presence of a friend can make all the difference. Our friend group has been through some rough stuff; death of spouses, divorce, job changes, moves, health issues and watching our kids leave the nest. We all have other friendship circles in the cities we live in, but we know we can count on each other even from a distance. If anyone in our group needs help, the others are there in a heartbeat.

 

A good friend provides encouragement, practical help, prayer, and a depth of kindness that comes from knowing someone so well. They remind us - we are not alone. Even when we need quiet, a friend’s willingness to sit with us in silence is an incredible support. When we allow others to carry burdens with us, we create bonds of trust and love that are unshakable.

 

God talks a lot about the value of friends:

Proverbs 17:17: “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”

This verse reminds us that true friends remain steadfast, especially in times of struggle. Their love is unconditional and enduring.

 

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.”

Friendship is a source of strength and mutual support. It illustrates how much we need each other to navigate the ups and downs of life.

 

Proverbs 27:17: “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”

True friends challenge us to grow spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. They don’t shy away from hard conversations but speak truth in love to help us become our best selves.

 

Friendship is more than a social convenience; it’s a necessity. At its core, friendship fulfills our God-given need for connection and belonging. In a world that often feels isolating, friendships give us a place to be fully known and loved. Strong friendships are linked to better mental health, lower stress levels, and increased longevity.

 

And even more, friendships are an expression of God’s design for community. When God created Adam, He said, “It is not good for man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18). This goes beyond marriage; it speaks to our fundamental need for companionship and relationship. The body of Christ is designed to function as a community — a family of believers who uplift one another in love and truth.

 

Friendship reflects God’s heart. It reminds us that we are created for connection, love, and support. Whether it’s staying connected with college friends, helping each other through adversity, or growing spiritually together, friendships add richness and meaning to our lives.

 

As we enter Thanksgiving, I am grateful for the depth of my friendships. I hope we can reflect on how to deepen and nurture the friendships we have and continue to build new ones. My hope and prayer for us is we are living in community, and that community reflects Jesus’ love and God’s plan for our lives. I’m not perfect, but thank be to God, imperfect people have friends. Because I am extremely grateful for the friends God has given me.

 

 

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